“If the story you're telling yourself is, I'm going to be home by Christmas, this is going to be over really soon, that's also a bad handle because life doesn't really care that that's what you think. The key is sort of picking something that's both hopeful, but also got a kind of a grit and a determination to it.”

So, you know, Epictetus is tortured by his, he's a slave, but he has this cruel master who tortures him. He breaks his leg at one point. And so he has this, he's crippled the rest of his life, which is, I guess, the term they would use then. And, you know, he said that, you know, we have, so he's, he's coming at this not from like some tenured academic perch, but like a dude who really suffered and went through stuff. And his thing was that we, every situation has two handles. You know, we get to decide what we're going to try to pick it up by. And yeah, you can, you can grab the handle that says, hey, I'm alive. This is good. Or you can grab the handle of like, why am I alive? This is horrible. And that handle is kind of everything. The lens through which we decide to interpret the events or the position we're in is kind of the first step. Because if you get that one wrong, all the other steps are really hard. I feel like if you're like, I was singled out, this is horrible. This is insurmountable. You can tell yourself a story that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. No, just telling yourself…